I like it when my group mates give me free reign to do what i feel confident about the project, and trust that I can do well in it, without having the need to turn down my (usually quite earth-shaking; hard-to-stomach) ideas; and then the project turns out to be an A!
Yay! =) Awesome Poseme!
wah, recently i feel like an epitome of what jokes are.
i sit down happily at soe concourse wanting some alone time before my mid terms, and:
1. a girl pull her charger wire across my bench and it doesn’t end here, she even asked me to look after her laptop for 40MINS! omgosh. do i look like free labor?
2. another girl come squeeze next to me on the same bench. do i look very welcoming?
3. And then, another incident when I was meeting a friend’s friend, and we were greeting each other for the first meeting:
my friend introduced me as megan, so I shook my hand with my friend’s friend:
‘hi, i am megan’, I said
‘hi, i am fox’, the friend’s friend replied
-_- does it seem very funny? maybe it does, because my friend’s friend laughed like nobody’s business at her joke.
4. Someone asked me to go for a concert, and I replied the person in the sms
‘Where is your “please”? And I am not going with you’ (I do sound damn hostile, but the person got a death sentence from me anyway, so the lack of a please in asking me for a concert outing, does not help. I also don’t appreciate egoistic guys who don’t go well on mannerisms with girls. So whatever).
And the person replied something along the line of wanting to go the concert only with me.
-_- seriously. I feel like replying that I don’t feel like going the concert only because it is you, and where is the PLEASE? No “please” again??! Goodness. No manners. Harry potter calls it “the magic word”.
The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved — loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves. ♥
10The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy;
I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
John 10:10
This verse sprung up to my attention recently, and I think it was said during altar call by Timothy during service. I kept it at the back of my mind, and I remembered it again during quiet time with God today.
I have been really at the epitome of irritableness and irritating others, mainly because I am really discontented that things in my life has been taken away, destroyed, and I feel really bare to the bones.
And then, it dawned on me that God’s purpose in my life is to make me whole and have a life to the full; not to take things away and make me crumble. I don’t think this is God’s motive.
Please remind me that I am whole in the Lord, that the Lord watches over me, that God will add on to my talents, strengthen my weaknesses and make me whole in areas I am incomplete. He does not take it all away from me. He does not. And I should stop blaming Him for all the lost, all the inadequacies. God is not an imperfect being that disappoints me. He does not.
Amen.
- CT Victory Meal
- CNY reunion with Mardi and Mariam at my house
- Plan Cambodia trip
i felt dumb for complaining about things on a public virtual platform- facebook and even here on this space. and especially so, after i see people’s comments on it. I think it means what i said is up to different interpretations, and especially frustrating because they are not aware of where i am coming from.
i guess in essence, i am someone who cannot and have learned not to accept things at face value. it takes a lot for me to be convinced/ convicted about something. and it takes even more for me to really grow to respect someone, and hold someone credible for his/ her words. I guess a huge part is partly due to my own trust in myself > more than in what is presented to me by the external realm.
I can name a few examples. I hear a Minister’s speech and I don’t accept what is presented to me at face value. I really question some of the promises and feasibility of the policies the MInister put forth.
I hear a sermon/ a teaching, I do not just nod my head at every point. I think even as humans are imperfect, the preacher is not perfect either, and there are points he put across that I must discern too.
I attend a lecture by a Prof, and I do not accept everything the Prof said as credible information, and I do not accept every theory thrown to me. I do criticize. And if I get a substandard answer, I will walk away dissatisfied, and feel why am I getting this from someone with a PHD?
This may seem very big and solid examples.
But it is not uncommon in my daily life.
I do, question why I am loved.
I do question why am I worth your effort, your time.
I think one day if Xiu stops asking why, stops questioning, stop looking beyond what is given at face value, and keep very quiet; I think I will lose the essence of who I am.
i am going to explode this sem.
i have such lousy profs this sem, whom i cannot help but disagree in class.
my ltb prof is so full of stupid stories, and so stubborn; when i disagreed with her, she refused to admit she made a mistake in her statement. and she goes around telling students that she admires them being bold in opinions. like what? being bold and yet the prof doesn’t admit she is wrong, does NOT help.
my aw prof goes through USELESS things in class, i even took the white board marker and led a class discussion for her, and told her to continue from where i started, just so she won’t digressed to useless topics.
and i was talking to a senior that this is what year 1 mods are like. profs dun expect much from yr 1s, so they give very little effort to year 1 mods too.
GOSH.
I think i have too high expectations of my profs.
and some are too damn disappointing this sem.
boring. useless. NO SUBSTANCE.
so frustrating.
someone asked me what is my allergy. i paused for a while, and came up with an answer, and i wanted to post it up here:
i am allergic to assholes
came back late home from sports award night.
reached home, didn’t sleep. went to do a farewell scrapbook for my bro.
and by the time i slept, i had to wake up very soon to send my bro off.
went to tekong in the wee hours of the morning to send my brother off. spent 4 hours in the blazing tekong island. and no, i didn’t cry. i know he’d do fine. he has been through worse sports outfield camps together with me before. tekong is nothing. it is all in the mind.
slept on the bus to the ferry terminal. slept on the ferry. slept during the talks in tekong. slept on the way back home. i was so sleepy, i was really missing my bed.
moment i reached home, i slept till a friend came over to my place with chocolates- it was a bet, if i didn’t sleep, i would get chocolates. but i slept, woke up and got chocolates anyway =)
prepared, and left house to meet the cg for Florence’s dance concert. had horrible headache throughout the evening.
now,i am home, officially dying from my headache. i miss my brother. his room seems so empty. no one disturb me.
Sports Awards Night 2010 with Women’s Rugby team. =)
Held at One fullerton, at butter fac. it was a good night.
Agnes won hot legs 
